Racing Stripe Beard

After 5 years(!)* of creating and documenting various beard removals, I'm finding it harder and harder to come up with new creative styles to sport (if only for long enough to take a picture). Luckily, beard removal day recently fell while hanging out with the circus. And if ever I've seen creative people, it's in the circus.

I decided to turn the reins over to a guest artist and let her do her worst. These awesome racing stripes are what she came up with. Not bad at all. I even let myself be talked into keeping said beard style for 36 hours (which included at least 2 trips to the grocery store and one river rafting trip*). The next day, when I went for the for the clean slate, there was another fun in between stage as well.

I kind of like this guest artist concept of the beard series. I may have to stick with it. If you've got an idea, sign up now!
Tuesday August 30 2011File under: beard

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The Monkey Tail

No doubt because of my [strictly documentary] habit of making and posting ridiculous beard pictures, a couple of astute readers pointed me to The Monkey Tail. And hey, a good idea is a good idea.

It turns out it is really hard to get a good picture of the monkey tail. Hopefully from these pictures, you get the idea. I submitted my photo to the website, but it got shot down. Snap! Oh well, at least it can be added to my ever increasing beard portfolio.
Wednesday June 8 2011File under: beard

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Flubbed Beard Opportunity

Recently, I shaved off the biggest beard I've had in a long time. It was big—ridiculously big. I haven't had one so big since my ill-fated appointment at the DMV almost 4 years ago.

Anyway, as I'm wont to do, I thought it a great opportunity to do a fun in-betweener beard. It was decided that it should be a 18th century old-timey mariner beard/chops*. So I went to work. But in the 10 or so pictures I took at the various stages of completion, I didn't get even one good shot. Alas. So goes life as a self-shot photographer.

Oddly enough, the last time the beard fully came off was in this same backyard in Portland. I never got around to posting the picture of that, so here it is: the always classic halfbeard.
Tuesday February 22 2011File under: beard

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Sketchy Dude

This past Halloween, I spent a good chunk of the day on a bus coming back from that fancy Rally that everyone has been so excited to hear about. Partially because of this and partly because I just didn't get my act together, I didn't do the whole costume thing. Luckily for me, however, some good friends threw their annual bash this weekend with a costumed theme: superheroes.

I went as Sketchy Guy. What, you've never heard of Sketchy Guy? Or maybe just not in superhero context? Well, let me tell you something, I've got all sorts of super powers. In fact, just come back to my place and I'll show you ;-) (Note to self: picking a costume that allows you to—nay, requires you to say sketchy things through the night is awesome. Awesome.)

Other notable costumes from the party: a spitting image of Mighty Mouse, Scotch Tape Woman*, Captain Hot Sauce, the Cupcake Kid, and possibly the best of all, Soroptimist Prime*.

Even though my costume failed me and I ended up going home alone*, I still had a great time. Costume parties are fun. Best of all, I've put together a costume that I can reuse next time I go out on the town*. Watch out, ladies!
Sunday November 14 2010File under: misc, beard

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The Riddler

Back in college, I did some experimentation, like we all did. This experimentation found its way into my real life in the form of beard art. Well, way back in the day, I tried out the "Riddler", but that was before the blog, so I thought I'd give it another go. Whadda ya think?

The downside is that unless you are looking from below, it more or less looks like a asymmetric goatee or otherwise failed stylish beard attempt, but I guess that isn't too far off.

(If you can't tell, I'm running low on ideas for beard art, so if you have any ideas on things I haven't tried, let me know before my next shave (in approx. 2 months.))
Sunday August 15 2010File under: beard

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A Beard With a Story

Here's the story:

There is a short beard-related documentary showing at the Pickford Cinema here in Bellingham. Being a beard enthusiast, I rallied my beard-o-phile friends together to go. Then I had the thought, "Hey, I'm due for my bimonthly shave anyway. Why not get creative for the event." I promptly called my buddy to borrow his hair buzzer.

Said buddy is a clowny fellow. And it just so happened that the buzzer exchange was going to happen at Vaudevillingham. Clown buddy decided that we should turn the ridiculous beard trimming into an act. I somewhat (but not really) reluctantly agreed.

The act was an audience plant act. I was the plant and I was to win the bid on a special hair-cut auction. When I got on stage, I sat down to get ready for my hair cut. Then out came Blinky. He brandished juggling knives, took a shot from his bottle of whiskey, then went to down on my beard. He climbed up on my knees, pretended to shave my legs*, shushed the audience, and generally clowned around.

And then I ended up with this beard. On the Trustworthiness of Beards scale, they call it a Horseshoe a.k.a. The Hogan and rate it "unsavory". If it is paired with oversized, yet mismatched, sideburns, I only imagine that moves it more to the "threatening" side of things. The upside is that after the movie, I'm free to shave it off. The downside is that that won't be until Tuesday.
Sunday April 18 2010File under: beard

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Progressively Sketchier


Granted this isn't nearly as cool as that progressive shaving video but I just wasn't feeling as inspired. Plus I was planning on leaving that right hand column style for a while. Well, I'm 5 days in and I'm digging it more and more everyday. That might, however, explain why I didn't have a date for Valentine's Day*. But for you beard/mustache nay-sayers out there, you'll be pleased to know that it will have to be gone by Wednesday when I will be heading up to the Olympic Games in Canada. Something tells me I might have any easier border crossing clean[-ish]shaven.
Monday February 15 2010File under: beard

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Movember

Have you heard of Movember*? As I understand it, the point is to get guys to grow mustaches (in November) in order to raise awareness of men's health issues. If you want to learn more about Movember (or just see a bunch of neat mustache pictures) check out their website.

Any excuse for ridiculous facial hair, I say. I've done quite a few straight mustaches recently so I thought I might go a little fancier. And differently than most shaving experiments, I actually wore this one out of the house and down to the bar*. If I didn't have to look semi-respectable the next morning, I might have kept it even longer. I kind of dig how it looks.

Oh, and here are a few pics of the process (that I am posting for posteriety, not because I've deluded myself into thinking people actually like seeing such shamelessly egotistical photos): before and halfway.
Saturday November 28 2009File under: beard

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Return of the Stache

I'm posting this for a couple reasons which I will present in bullet format.
  • It's been a while since I've posted and I don't want anyone to worry
  • I've kind of started a tradition of posting my intermittent beard shaves, so I should prolly keep with that. (It's got its own tag and everything.)
  • I'm sad I couldn't keep this style around longer. I had it for 3 days (mostly for a frisbee tournament), but a business meeting came up and I didn't want to look too ridiculous for that. But now that it is here on the blog, it will live forever.
But don't worry folks, my summer of adventure (therefore lack of posting) is more or less over, so posting should become regular again. I've got a couple good ones I'm working on so stay tuned. As a teaser, I'll tell you this week's Friday Comic comes from a brand new artist. Good times.
Tuesday August 18 2009File under: beard

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Stars And Stripes Forever

A couple of ridiculous beard posts ago, I hinted at wanting to attempt to "honor" Flag Day with an appropriate beard. Well, I tried. Here's my attempt at stars and stripes forever. It turns out that we had a much harder time using a sketchy beard as a canvas than ole Betsy Ross did with a bit of canvas. The star was a total failure and the stripes* are a little on the crooked side. But we tried. And it was fun. Maybe someday I will invest in one of those precision trimmers or maybe throw down on a barber (Wouldn't that be a hoot? Walk in to an old timey barber shop and ask them to turn your beard into a, say, sun and moon scape to commemorate summer solstice or something. I can see the look on old Lee's face now.) For now, I'll just make due with what I've got.
Wednesday June 17 2009File under: beard

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